A B-User

Once every few months or so,
I wake up from fevered nightmares,
Much like the tormented Eloi,
Subverted by telepathic monsters.

Once every few months or so,
As I lie awake upon my bed I wonder,
Will this be a lifelong cross to bear,
Scars that arose from misplaced fears.

Once every few months or so,
When the world outside slumbers,
Uncertainties provide me cover,
As doubts render my self-worth asunder.

Once every few months or so,
Under Elune’s ever vigilant sight,
I question every step I have taken,
Was it abuse or was I just mistaken?

Once every few months or so,
As I struggle to see in the darkness,
Reminders of manipulation arise,
Of true evil hidden inside innocent eyes.

Once every few months or so,
As comforting arms wrap around me,
The scars left within my head grow,
Fainter as if to say there may be some hope.

Once every few months or so,
Safety makes my eyelids relax in slumber,
Reality floods my mind in show,
Of support that life is a perpetual flow.

Once every few months or so,
In my dreams I smile again,
You might have tormented me once but,
Now all you are in my life is a B-user,
An eventually inconsequential discarded loser.